Life. Here. Now

  Those of you, who know me, would be familiar with my ongoing torrid love affair with Nature’s favourite (and also spoilt, in my opinion) child, Rain. It’s a predictable one, like most, a love-hate kind, with more love, and less of the latter. He never fails to inspire awe in me…a child-like wonder! While ousting me from the most stuporous of slumps, I can’t help but wear a smile, as worries seem to magically melt away. He amplifies my cheerful spirits on a good day, to one of unadulterated joy, awakening the slumbering poet within me into pouring out the most reverent odes, like the one I’m spewing right now! Whoever says that chivalry is dead hasn’t experienced him deftly blending in with the tears streaming down their faces, shielding vulnerable selves from curious, inquisitive eyes. Very much the tease, he enjoys keeping me guessing, as I stew over his intentions;   A few warning drops here, a pleasant drizzle there, a shower where there’s eager anticipation and...

This morning, as I sat in my car, and drove to work, I took in a deep breath, and was startled as I realised that it was my first conscious deep breath that I’d taken freely, without resistance in almost two weeks! I can almost see your foreheads crinkle in disbelief and mouths twist at my exaggeration. Well, that’s what it felt like. Like I hadn’t breathed in weeks; and this free, unrestricted inhalation and exhalation, brought upon me a sense of release, like steam being let out of a pressure cooker! Phew! What a relief! A huge weight instantaneously lifted off my shoulders, the heart felt lighter, and my mind,restful. This lightness was   further enhanced by the delightful pepperminty freshness of the sugar-free mints, that I’d popped in my mouth.   It had been a tough last couple of weeks. Plagued with worry, anxiety, tense hours, unrest, tiredness and illness. The emotions of intense dislike and hurt, and my grudges disappeared in a flash, along with the...

You sneaked in through the iron bars of my heart, caught me unawares Unobtrusively so. Unalarmingly so. Realisation dawned, but a moment too late, by when You sat, comfortably encushioned between my battling morals, pleased ego Warning guilt, traitorous desire, emotions running high and low. Why do I deceive myself so? I watched you closing in, watched you snare your hook Knowing fully well, it was against the rules of the book Neither friend nor foe, yet, I dipped in, a toe I met you halfway, then why do I deceive myself so? Flattered beyond words, ignorance I feigned As I spied naked desire, in your eyes, and on your face Fooling myself by closing my eyes, I slipped you the keys, hand-in-hand Nonchalant on the outside, doing an excited little jig on the inside Controls in-hand, my time, I did bide. Then, why do the tears flow, unchecked so? From the pain of disappointment, as you draw the blinds? I helped you drive the blade ...

You've been running, fast, swept ahead by the advancing tide. You ride the wave confidently, exhilaration dripping off your body, basking in this glow of new-found self worth and adulation, starry-eyed in anticipation of what's to come. The wave crashes against the shore, and you jump off, jubilant at having conquered it. You look ahead at the oncoming swell, tasting the salt on your lips, taking a minute to catch your breath. The world comes to a temporary pause. It's only you, amongst the wind and the waves, the protagonist on a stage, and a full-house to cheer you on. You spy, out of the corner of your eye, other actors dipping their toes in, testing the waters, taking advantage of your breather. A warning niggles in the recesses of your mind, yet you look on,  breathing in deep, unfazed, schooling yourself. You deserve the break, need it, infact. A refuel, before you plunge in, charged and raring to go. Why welcome Exhaustion on board? A blink to s...

I noticed a white breasted kingfisher perched on the stairs by the pavement the other day, resplendent in the bright yellow heat of the sun. One evening, a few days later, during my walk, almost a nightly ritual, I notice a black drongo! I don't know the first thing about birds, neither am I keen on watching them. I would get bored during trips to the bird sanctuary because they all looked the same to me, unless of course, i spot a sea of beautiful pink flamingos, an indignant-looking ostrich, a proud peacock showing off it's dance or a regal appearing hawk. Is it the effect of the lockdown, this new-found interest? Not to mention, the birds that feel safe to venture out in the open, in the absence of the usual human hustle-bustle. I know this, everytime I identify a species, a frisson of pleased excitement runs through my veins. I also particularly enjoy sitting out in my balcony, in the mid-day silence, looking into the salt troughs in the distance, ear drums c...

A few more days, and it’s bye-bye 2019, and hello 2020! As the years go by, it feels like time is bettering itself, picking up speed gradually, accelerating ever so smoothly, that we passengers riding in the car of time, are almost oblivious to the same. This year has been no different. It feels different though. I feel different. Older, hopefully wiser, more confident, more at peace with myself and my reality. A few years ago, I’d have called this year a roller-coaster ride, but compared to the years past, 2019’s been a relatively smooth motorboat ride through slightly choppy salty waters, the vibration and hint of turbulence only adding to the excitement of an otherwise fun cruise. No complaints there! Fortune introduced me to a horde of varied individuals this year; people unlike myself, unlike many that I’ve met during my what-seems-to-me like a long lifetime, but probably short for many. Not until very recently, have I paused to marvel at the gazillion permutations a...

So, its been an eventful week! I got back on the work scene, as I began a brand-new, full-time, job-that-I-really-wanted. I am still reeling from the excitement of all the appreciation and the connect with my last blog post. Well, it didn’t go viral or anything, but the immense response that I got, the dialogue that it generated, was exciting, to say the least. I felt like we connected, and you let me know, that we did. That’s the reason I am writing this piece today. To say, thank you. To express my gratitude to all of you, who take the time out to read my pieces, that I post intermittently; when time permits, or when the writing-bug bites me in the bum.  Why now, you may ask? I’ve only written eight or nine pieces on my blog, and weekly reviews or small pieces voicing out my opinions on Instagram. Your love, though, has me overwhelmed. Everyone, including me talks about how materialistic the world has become, how no-one has any time anymore. No time to...

For as long as I can remember, my gal pals and I, have always cribbed about being a few pounds overweight. Over the years, the few pounds have multiplied in magnitude. Even when I did not have a weight-issue, I remember grumbling about my being ‘fat’, or not having a small enough waist, all because it was expected, and the cool thing to do! I remember in class 9, the corridor loo would be our hangout spot between lessons. It was anything but fancy! Just your regular cubicles, smelly most times, with washbasins in front, each with a mirror of its own. We would just crowd around the mirrors, giggling, primping our hair, reapplying lip-balms, moaning over emerging acne while secretly comparing waist lines, which unfortunately in most cases, was also an indication of one’s coolness, attractiveness, social-superiority or lack thereof. I cant help but laugh as i recall, how we used to loudly announce and invite our ‘cool’ friends to hang out with, in the loo, of all places ...

Hello all you wonderful people! Time is like a disobedient child, I like to think. It does exactly the opposite of what one’d like. In the time it took me to bat my eyelids, three months have elapsed since my last post! 2018 has been an exciting whirlwind so far. We welcomed my precious little baby girl into our world. Everyday is like a repetitive movie played on fast-forward. Feed, burp, diaper change, repeat! As much as it used to amuse me, I have now turned into one of those mothers who are constantly raving about their baby’s latest milestone! She’s my little miracle, a gift, after months of forced penance. You all know my story. (For the newbies, you may refer to the ‘Gestational heebie-jeebies’ series on my page.) Introspecting during the rare free minute, counting my blessings, I cannot help, but reminisce the recent past. Seven months of bed-rest, anxiety and uncertainty. When prolonged rest is enforced upon you, its far from a vacation. It’s a mental struggl...

Life is a rat-race for most. A race against time, that we all wish to win. Especially when, we are all aware, that any moment, our breath may choose to stop infusing us with ‘life energy’.  We are all swept along with the flowing tide, from birth, in a rush to satisfy our insatiable desires, while the stop watch begins its countdown. We adaptable humans, have adopted the practise of ‘ multitasking ’, to aid us in our endeavours. What is multitasking?   Multitasking is a word, very much in vogue today,  defined by the Oxford english dictionary  as, dealing with more than one task at the same time. This term originated in the field of computer science initially, wherein computers were programmed to complete multiple tasks at the same time, and this was gradually extended to human application.  However, the practise is older than the word itself. Life without multitasking is unimaginable. Multitasking can be concurrent, wherein we...